get the picture

It's been a while since I made a "what's going on" blog post. My posts in that vein in the past have been kind of picayune and naive; I am not eager to spout any more shit like that. All the while here, always busy, and going through changes. Cryptic poetry is, in general, more appropriate for me, but I want to be explicit for the moment.

At the turn of the year, or whenever, I would say: "yeah let me just be good to my family and try to get my life on track." But then I transitioned. And then I broke up with my coparent. Then I rebuilt myself. And now my career, the same; because autistic burnout was just too much to handle. The timing couldn't be worse, but I didn't have a choice. I literally couldn't do it anymore, and alas — no mental health leave.

So yes, here I am again; trying to bootstrap myself as a freelancer again after 4 years in corporate. But this time I'm not a quirky new father with help from my in-laws. Now I'm a gothic trans lesbian and an estranged parent, and the world is falling apart in drastic and catastrophic ways.

World War III has been in progress for at least 4 years, probaly more like 24. The NWO imperialists need to have absolute control over everything. Fuel, metals, the narrative, and the women. And they won't stop until nothing stands in their way.

In my circles, even in person, I say stuff like this, and rarely is anyone legitimately surprised. Which is good. It shouldn't come as a surprise. But even so, what is anybody doing about it? Still feeding the machine — buying new cars, buying new computers, buying garbage food where 90% of your payment goes to the fossil-fuel industrial complex.

And everybody's still on corporate social media "for the reach," despite the fact that that reach isn't yours to actuate, and the shit design and the shit implementation and the lack of privacy. And everybody's using google docs and m$ office (oh it's literally "copilot: the app" now isn't it?) to do their word processing, and both windows and mac OS are becoming more enshittified by the day, and now they're trying to make you scan your government ID in every website and even just to use the fucking computer.

And I say stuff like "y'know we have a food co-op and it's not that expensive" or "we have a local regenerative farm you can give your compost to" or "I've been using linux as a daily driver for 16 years and it's pretty dope". There's always an excuse for defering agency. The honest ones say something like "I'm lazy."

Is this really the state of things?

Or I'll mention what just happened in Kansas, and people haven't even heard. How long before it happens in my state? Or before they start coming door to door to declare us illegal to our faces, or just shoot us dead in the street and justify it however they want? They're already doing it to the brown people. How long before it's the queers and the poor and the neurodivergent and the disabled?

Even just daring to imagine something different may soon be punishable. Slavery is still here, but now they want to destroy all possibility for opposition. And now they can, cause they can just kill us and enslave robots who (perhaps) won't talk or fight back.

But I'm still here. I'm still trying. We need to lift each other up if we want to survive. It's going to be difficult. It's going to require effort. We can do it but we have to give a shit.